The Price is Right:
Dumb Jokes From Wisconsin!

Q. Why did Willie Nelson get hit by a semi?
A. Because he was playin' On the Road Again.

Q. How do you break a geek's finger?
A. Punch him in the nose.

Q. Why did Mickey Mouse divorce Minnie Mouse?
A. Because she was f----n' Goofy.

Q. How many shrinks does it take to change a lightbulb?
A. Only one, but it takes a long time and the lightbulb has to want to change.

Q. What's purple, two feet long, and goes like this? (funny face)
A. I don't know either but it's right there. (point to shoulder)

The Price is Right: Could college be easier? It takes a mere 50 hours of my life every week. But, hey, it's not decorative stucco or some shitty job like that.
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I know you wanna get laid tonight
But I'm tryin' ta get paid tonight
We ain't even gotta fuss and fight
Just hit me right; it's on all night
I know you wanna get in bed with me
But, you gotta come correctly
Nothin' in life is free: Especially not me.
-Chyna Whyte, "Nothins Free", Lil Jon and the East Side Boyz Kings of Crunk, (c) 2002 TVT Records
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Well, at least, Chyna you tellin me this 'fo we git started. I had a girl just disappear with my CDs and wallet.

Skippin school is an important part of your education. It tells your professors where they stand. Namely, that they're getting paid $75,000 a year and you're going to make it easy for them.
P.S. Put yo' hood up! Bia-bia! Okay!

I went to get my Kia fixed. They brought out the loaner; a 197? Dodge icecream truck. I asked, "Is there anyway to turn off those damn bells?"
"Sure," replied the mechanic, "you just turn the engine off."

The Price Is Free

Linux is free. Wi-fi is free. Get them both and be free. Dub ta da izzo. Wi-fi ask wi-fi try wi-fi. You will not go to Hell for dissing Bill Gates. You won't even go to traffic court. It's free. It's free. It's free. Why did you pay for it? Because Dell made you. You had no choice. Try linux, it's free. You can even run Windows on the same hard drive as Linux. And linux is free, try it.